i met a girl with 12 nipples
*walks into job interview* why should you hire me? well ill let you know that one time i got five notes on a text post on tumbler dot com
time to update my resume
the ships that i end up investing myself the most in are the ones where at first im like, “meh i guess i can see that” and then somewhere along the line my brain just fucking snaps and i cant control myself its like a demons possessed me and im going 900mph to hell
bras are so expensive like i didn’t choose the boob life the boob life chose me
I remember when I thought people in their 20’s were adults. Now all of my friends are in their 20’s and everybody is just kind of fumbling around bumping into each other, trying to figure out where the free food is……
so that’s pretty much what I’m expecting to experience for the next like 10 years.
the accuracy of this post is alarming.
the best kind of people are the really cute ones that you wanna cuddle and drink hot chocolate and go for walks in the park and watch dumb movies and build blanket forts with but also slam up against a wall and fuck their brains out